@SCbchbum: Did you know if you send a fancy iPhone emoticon to a non-iPhone user, it just shows up as a middle finger?
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@slooberbie: "Please! There’s no need to interact with me. I’m just here to observe." -me in every social situation
@WhoCuppedMyCake: If your ex is dropping subtle hints drop bigger hints. Like a toaster in a bathtub.
@AIMMadellynne: Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers.. If you do find one... What's your plan?