@WilliamAder: Digging through a box in the closet, I found a picture of me sitting on Santa's lap. Hard to believe that was almost a year ago.
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@ricsem: I wouldn't want to fly Virgin. Who'd want to fly an airline that doesn't go all the way?
@daemonic3: [CSI at Starbucks] "Ma'am you've been robbed. Suspect is at large." Barista: At what? "At large" At what? "At venti?" OMG HOW AWFUL!!!
@VailshireCap: "Daddy, tell me again about how you wasted time before Twitter existed?" "Well son, we used to look at clouds & pretend they were animals."