@BrickStoneNews: Do Russia and Uganda realize if they put all their gay people in jail then jail will become the nicest part of their country?
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@lachlan: Lincoln and Twilight opening the same weekend? Once again, Abe gets killed in a theater, and he's already fought vampires once this year.
@rickolantern: You didn't have to say "he's a male nurse." When you said 'he' my psychic ability of gender discernment kicked in.
@emmatheist: Unwritten rule: if you find an unconscious security guard you have to drag him to a supply closet and change into his uniform.
@tararose711: My 3yo's bedtime stories include: "Three-Hour Run-On Sentence," followed by, "Ask For a Drink 500 Times," and finally, "You Skipped a Page."