@murrman5: do you have any idea how fast you were going?
"no, I'm not wearing my contacts"
@sofarrsogud: ME: [introducing my brother's daughter whose name I've forgotten]
This is niece.
@DaveWeasel: My dance moves are so white Charlie Sheen tried to snort them.
@tricycle_champ: ME: Man, I really should get glasses. I'm blind as a--
BAT NEXT TO ME: blind as a what
BAT: as a what
BAT: say it
@Darlainky: I was out of tanning oil once, so I used PAM® Cooking Spray. The tan didn't stick.
@AimeeHelene1: CW: What's for lunch; smells good!
Me: Well I made lasagna last night but lost a fingernail in it & haven't found it yet.