@Humor_Fetish: "Do you want to be the numerator or the denominator tonight...? You're so radical!" How I hit on my imaginary mathematician girlfriend
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@GreenishDuck: Sorry it took me 10 months to text you back. I'm a snake now and I typed this with my head.
@hangin_out: During my prostate exam I asked the doctor, "where should I put my pants"? "Over there by mine", was not the answer I was expecting.
@drewjanda: Imagine a spider. Scary, right? Wrong. This spider is imaginary. Really makes you think