@Rollinintheseat: Donald Trump always looks like he's trying to apply lip gloss in a rear view mirror.
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@roadkill3x: I thought I saw a coyote in the yard tonight but I couldn't tell because it didnt have an anvil.
@glo_stevens: Mama said there'd be days like this, and also "knock you out" ??? I don't know, you talk to her. She sounds drunk.
@jimmytorosian: Me: Have a taste of your own medicine *I force the pills the Dr. prescribed for me down his throat* Me: WHO HAS ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION NOW?!