@XplodingUnicorn: Donald Trump's chief speechwriter is a random deck from Cards Against Humanity.
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@JohnHilsen: Was out on the golf course and shot an eagle at Hole 9. Mom doesn't believe me, but wait till she sees the eagle.
@JimmySelfDest: Fight club. Only naps instead. Rules the same. Just no fights. Only secret, uninterrupted glorious naps.