@Soberphobiccc: Don't fall in love. You will get feelings and die.
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@VikeeysSecret: Aladdin's love for carpet rides must have saved Jasmine thousands of dollars in waxing fees and razors.
@BringDaNoyz: ME: [trying to console a friend whose house has been demolished] Cheer up, bulldozing is the sincerest form of flattery
@sarcasm_inc: Sorry I'm late, guys. SOMEbody.. *gestures at wife* told me this knife fight started at.. *sees everyone holding guns* FANtastic, Ellen