@casual_koala: Don't get upset if you hit a lot of red lights on your way to work. You'd turn red too if you had to change in the middle of the street.
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@emsykay: Animal behavior can warn you when an earthquake is coming. Like the night before the last earthquake,our dog took the car keys and drove off
@ClamDive: Every episode of my life starts with a short recap and the voice over says "Previously on wasted potential..."
@briangaar: If you pull a lizard's tail off, it will grow back. If you pull it off again, the lizard will be like "dude."