@GinRumMe: Don't go chasin' waterfalls. If a waterfall isn't staying in place you probably have bigger things to worry about. Run for your life.
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@LaziestCanine: First date: [ok, don't let her know you're a t-rex] Her: I absolutely love it when guys open the car door for me Me: Shit.
@markydoodoo: Hit the showers. Smack a sink. Verbally assault a bathtub. Make everyone at Home Depot uncomfortable.
@ninetek: I bet the guy who invented falling asleep was totally like "Oh no! I died! Hey, wait a minute..."