@hazelmotes1: Don't judge. Maybe I'm conducting a study of the effects of prolonged laziness on a human body. You don't know.
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@iinkedZombie: 5: let's play the quiet game. Me: Okay 5: ready..? Start. Me: 5: Me: 5: whoever talks first is the loser.
@o__0Dev: Getting out of bed in the morning always gave me a headache until I tried it feet first.
@wickedsuga: My cashier at the grocery store bagged the tomatoes with the ketchup and I swear I could hear them screaming.
@iwearaonesie: wife *comes running out of the bedroom* Kill it! Kill it! me *runs in* wife: Did you get it!? me [has no idea wtf she's talking about] Yep