@realHamOnWry: Don’t let them fool you. Squirrels are just rats dressed in Armani.
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@Hormonella: Wish I could focus on anything with even half the intensity of my dog watching me eat yogurt.
@Shame_Is: doctor: u are overweight me: hah yeah doc: ok drop your pants me: ur giving mixed messages doc! doc: me: doc: me: so do u like the Indians
@TwoSapphiresBlu: Daughter: Why don't kids at school get my sarcastic humor? Me: Because they have boring parents, darling.
@relatabledad: coming to theaters soon: Dawn of the Rise of the Dawn of the Planet of the Rise of the Rise of the Dawn of the Apes