@TheRachelFisher: Don't "pshhh" me, you stupid bus.
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@_4kidscrazy: Me: let's try to catch snowflakes on our tongues! Wife: but we're inside.?. Me: shhhh, just close your eyes.
@jake_lach: She said she hates my analogies and wishes I would communicate like a normal person, but that's like telling a samurai not to use his sword
@OrvllShrednbchr: 10 years ago, as a joke, I told everyone I was giving up sex for Lent. Haven't gotten laid since. Well played, God.