@curlycomedy: Dress for the job you want others to think you have.
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@AimeeHelene1: At my funeral, I want them to play "Thriller" and have someone that looks like me climb out of a casket, dancing. (wins at death)
@Reverend_Scott: Rum: "Drink me." Me: "No, I'll get a hangover." Rum: "Nah, you'll get funnier and better looking!" Me: "Really?" *drinks* Rum: "Sucker."
@GloriaFallon123: I hope Kim and Kanye surprise everyone and name this next kid something like Bill or Jen
@ilovepie84: I bet when David Hasselhoff gets too drunk he roams the streets screaming "KITT!" When he can't find his car.