@thomaslennon: Dropped my son for his first day of kindergarten today. Does anybody know what age you're supposed to pick them up?
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@RocketRankoon: [picks up date] *slides over hood of car* *slides off car onto another car* *slides off that one onto another car* *date looks at her watch*
@KaptainKoRnie: Bf and I are on 2 completely different emotional planes right now. Work faster, whiskey.
@JermHimselfish: Sorry I didn't text you back, my hands are sore from karate chopping loaves of bread in half and feeding them to starving children all day.
@bighandsmassuer: If you send her a message and she doesn't reply in six months she is probably thinking about it