@WilliamAder: Drove a wedge of suspicion today between the fast food employee at the first window and the one at the second.
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@SamanthaaaReece: Me: today I'm not apologizing for ANYTHING!!!!!! *almost steps on pigeon* Me: omg sorry sorry sorry
@liv_thatsme: If I get nervous for a date, I just imagine the guy in his underpants, sitting on my couch for the next 40 years, & suddenly I'm annoyed
@hazelmotes1: I keep my monocle freshly waxed so it easily slips out of my eye socket and falls into my cup of tea whenever I'm shocked by your behavior.
@ThisOneSayz: Me *points gun at clerk*: stick 'em up!! Put Algebra 25 and *looks at college syllabus* Psychology 15 in the backpack!