@yoyoha: "Eat her already!" - Animal watching people kissing
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@ashleyaustrew: Dating: *prances around in underwear and his t-shirt* Marriage: *Unzips footed unicorn onesie* Do you think this mole is cancer?
@lloydrang: Parents who say they love their children unconditionally have obviously never had a kid choose tuba as their band instrument.
@QwertyJones3: I live in fear of my kids going outside when it's raining, because they could get wet and multiply.