@ImaFlyontheWall: If your nervous tick is pointing to the sky then might i suggest not going to auctions anymore.

@imadepoopstoday: Your water broke? Do I look like an idiot? You can't "break" water...get back to work.

@gonzohostility: Said she was gonna send a pic of her "backyard' . Turns out we weren't on the same page

@HonestToddler: If you are what you eat I'm a small family of ladybugs :)

@Adyaces: The first time I stayed at my girlfriends' house, her dad wouldn't let us sleep together. Shame, he's very attractive.