@rolldiggity: Either the kids on my street were playing with sidewalk chalk, or this is a crime scene and a bunch of stars and cats just got murdered.
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@kiel_phillips: JELLYFISH: *to friend* Want to see something disgusting? Watch this. *stings person* FRIEND: That wasn't dis... JELLYFISH: Wait a minute.
@bridger_w: FYI, you don't have to be a waiter in order to go in a restaurant and wander from table to table asking people, "How's everything tasting"
@AnkCoupleTO: I was in the mood for nuts this morning so I chased a squirrel for 3 miles and the little prick led me right to his stash, yum!