@Bill_Nye_Tho__: elephants sleep standing up you could be chillin with an elephant and at any moment they could just be like "lmao for sure, g'night"
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@Lisa_Laughs_: I'm just a girl, with a baseball bat, smashing my internet modem into a gazillion pieces.
@bourgeoisalien: #TT At 14 I yelled, "You'll NEVER understand Morrissey,dad!!" and tried to run dramatically out of the room but ran into a wall & fell over.
@dafloydsta: WIFE: He treats our marriage like it's a talk show THERAPIST: Is this true? ME: *turns and winks at camera* We'll find out after the break