@KrunkedRobot: Entered what I ate today into my new fitness app and it just sent an ambulance to my house.
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@EndhooS: Noah's wife: r u joking right now? Noah: my hands are tied babe Noah's Wife: but.. we're married? Noah: I'm sorry but he said 2 of each species Noah's mate Dave: [pushing past with an xbox] If only there was another way
@Mr_Kapowski: ME: Do we have Bacon Bits? WIFE: Fridge. Why? ME: *filling pockets* No reason *dog park* PERSON: Sorry. He's normally behaved ME: No prob
@Wussawilla: Remember when you first joined twitter and you had no idea how to RT or what favstar was and remembered what your family looked like?