@splendidcynic: Establish dominance at the dentist by hitting them with a rock and asking if THAT is comfortable.
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@david8hughes: [date] Me: you wanna see what desserts they have? Wife: how about we go home & I'll let you- Me [calls waiter]: what desserts do u have?
@trevso_electric: "Everyone give us money in case something happens and when something happens we'll call you a liar." -insurance
@karencreets: Blah blah blah employee handbook, just get to the point where you say if you're gonna drug test me or not