@splendidcynic: Establish dominance at the dentist by hitting them with a rock and asking if THAT is comfortable.
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@BoomBoomBetty: A thick layer of mayonnaise on all your furniture will remove water rings from wood and unwanted guests from your house.
@tamberinetango: Chances of my kid no longer liking their 'favourite' snack the day after I bought the Costco size box of it? 210%
@gobmentcheese: You don't know what real fear is, until you've been cornered by a Mariachi band playing a rendition of Hotel California.