@Darlainky: Establish your dominance with the drive-thru attendant by saying, "That completes my order" before they ask.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@JazzTrombonist: I accidentally texted my wife with voice recognition...while playing the trombone
@AimeeHelene1: *picks out all the marshmallows from your Lucky Charms* *replaces them with Flintstones vitamins* You looked a little sickly.
@daemonic3: [divorce court] ME: ...and that's why I am seeking full custody JUDGE: Again, this court does not decide custody of the "Netflix password"
@LoneWolfStories: It's like my fridge sends texts inviting all my friends over the moment I fill it up.