@WigCannon: Eventually, some poor astronaut is going to crash into all that Star Wars writing
@birbigs: Quentin Tarantino + Johnny Depp = Rango Django
@kelkulus: Nobody has 3 cats. You either have 1 or 2, but from there you leap directly to 17.
@KtotheK39: I dated a guy so arrogant he walked into a post while looking at his reflection in a store window. I left him.
Unconscious on the street.
@1evilidiot: A protected acct with 0 followers just followed me. Mom, is that you?
@mattsurely: If anyone out there is named Aesop dear god please open a table store I have just the name for you.