@somelightcrying: Ever find a mirror that makes you look really good and you're like oh OK this is where I live now I live in this airport restroom now
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@causticbob: To tell the difference between African and Indian elephants you have to look at their ears. You lift one up and shout "Where are you from?"
@Lowenaffchen: Katana is Japanese for "sword". In Japan they have great respect for swords and their moms dont knock them off the wall while vacuuming
@NamestartswithZ: SCIENTIST: You are my finest creation, and I love you like a son even though you've malfunctioned and now only say- ROBOT: Fight me, dipshit