@TheNaique: Every time a magician graduates from his school and throws his hat in the air at the convocation, PETA sues him for cruelty to rabbits.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@therealeatwood: ME: [spraying hose to make a rainbow over a bear trap] WIFE: stop trying to trap a leprechaun ME: I really want a pot of gold or some cereal
@DanMentos: [first date] me: they know me here date: *reading sign on wall* "No Puppetry"? me (proudly): I'm the reason they have that
@BlindVigil: Q: "How long were you at your last job?" A: "Seven-and-a-half inches... same as now"