@Thee1_4U: Everybody is complaining about their significant other, and I'm over here trying to keep mine charged above 10%.
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@Alex_LaVallee: HUGE shout out to Will Smith! With out him we never would have survived the alien attack in '96. Happy Independence Day!
@QwertyJones3: [Starbucks] "Yes, I'd like a venti skinny soy half-sweet one-pump caramel macchiato half-caff extra whip, please." Barista: Is Pepsi ok?
@Chel__CLE: Until a pregnancy test commercial involves a chick hysterically crying & screaming MY LIFE IS OVER, it's not real life.
@kateberlant: Once accidentally liked an insta of someone I hadn’t spoken to in yrs so I had to like 1/2 her entire feed & reach out abt getting lunch