@Severnjaca: Everyone hates the word moist until they eat a very dry muffin.
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@Thedudish: "Is my butt is too big?" my girlfriend asked, staring at her reflection in the mirror. Sensing a trap, I fell to the ground and played dead.
@DaddyJew: Boss:my office, now! Me:*to myself* dont be about Twitter dont be about Twitter B:we've had a sexual harassment complaint M:Oh thank God!
@just1fool: If you're looking for someone to tell you what to do in the bedroom I'm pretty good at instructing on how to install window blinds.
@SCbchbum: Ok, Surgeon General, alcohol is bad for pregnant women. The warning label might be more effective stating alcohol causes pregnant women.