@Sal0630: Everyone knows she can't get pregnant if she's on top. It's called gravity, stupid.
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@ArfMeasures: ANAESTHETIST: Count backwards from 100 ME: 100..99..98 ME: ..3..2..1..um [looks round] now what? ANAESTHETIST [muffled] You have to find me
@sammyrhodes: "You know what would make a good gift for this 3yr old? A harmonica." - people without kids
@UncleDuke1969: "I'm THIRSTY!" "Can I have a drink?" "DAAAAAAAAD!" "I WANT WAAAAAAAAAAAAATER!" See? My son can turn water into whine, too. Your move, God.
@Bexdora: In every teen body-swap film there's that moment where they look in the mirror & are shocked to see an adult. That's my morning routine now.