@LeonEarlgrey: Everytime a suburban white kid throws up a gang sign, an angel misses brunch.
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@mattgallo123: The only thing more shocking than finding water on planet Mars would be finding me in Planet Fitness.
@OutOfLeftField_: Ex: Do you ever think of someone else when we have sex? Me: No, it's always George Clooney.
@TheTweetOfGod: THE TOP TEN WORDS OF 2012!! 1. End 2. Of 3. Year 4. Top 5. Ten 6. Lists 7. Are 8. Exercises 9. In 10. Stupidity
@HellisWorthit: My spanish class in high school should have had a bit less "Where is the bathroom" and a bit more "She was dead when we got here".