@KevinBuffalo: Exercising can add years to your life. For example I jogged 4 miles today and now I feel like I'm 73.
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@StephenBCramer: Nana's house is getting real bad, you can't swing a dead cat without hitting another dead cat.
@tastefactory: BLIND DATE TIP FOR WOMEN: Throw a fork into the wall behind ur date so he has to turn around, to make sure he doesn't have a hidden ponytail
@SteveDutzy: *logs on Facebook IT'S YOUR OLD HIGH SCHOOL BULLY'S BIRTHDAY TODAY! *logs off WAIT COME BACK! YOU HAVEN'T HEARD ABOUT YOUR EX'S ENGAGEMENT!