@McNevich: Facebook game requests are the Jehovah's Witnesses of the Internet
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@fillthevacuum: Doggy day care is like a regular day care except you have to enter from the rear.
@JosesLovesYou: I remember back in the day when you had to roll up a tiny scroll and give it to a falcon to tweet
@QwertyJones3: [Sci fi movie] How did you travel such a distance so fast? "I went through a wormhole." Worms in the audience: Omg this is so unrealistic.
@ilovepie84: You would be surprised at how many people will run if you yell "ITS A TRAP" and run in a random direction