@kwirkyKerri: Facebook tells me those vans are dangerous, but Twitter says they have candy. So conflicted.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@TheDailySchmuck: Black Super Mario *Jumps on mushroom* *Throws fireball at turtle* *Slides down sewer pipe* *Arrested for assault, arson, and trespass*
@clindsaysway: Whenever I'm in a difficult situation, I think, "What would I do?" so I can do the opposite thing
@robfee: If Lebron's so much better than Jordan then explain to me why Bugs Bunny has never once asked for his help in a game. Cant argue with facts.
@TheMichaelRock: HR: Did you call Brenda fat? Me: No. I told her that based on her size, she should be more jolly. HR... Me: Big difference.