@ObscureGent: Fact: In the 80s nobody could have sex until someone started playing a saxophone.
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@briangaar: Sometimes I'm playing a dangerous game like Halo & people ask if I get scared but honestly no, your training just takes over
@usermcuserface: Manager to waiter: Wait for it.. Wait for it.. (Sees me take a huge bite of food) Go! Go! Go! Waiter: so how is everything today?
@ericarhodes: and one last joke for the day. And I will be off driving back to Claremont for two shows. Have a beautiful day.
@dafloydsta: ME: I assume you don't want your dog to see this? *slides over pic of him with another dog* JUDGE: *sweating* Bailiff, release this man.