@robdelaney: Families that do Christmas card photo shoots months before Christmas have the organizational skills of high-level Nazis.
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@sarcasticmommy4: For anyone who says parents can't have Friday night fun, I'm at Target right now buying toilet paper. So, yeah, you're right.
@jimmytorosian: Me: I just souped up my car Person: What kind of engine did you put in it? *cut to me filling my car with tomato soup* Me: Um... A fast one.
@VerbsRProudest: Yes I wore a $900 fuchsia southern belle dress to your kid's baptism. When I was your bridesmaid, you said I could always wear it again.