@DickScurvy: Family vacation is when you listen to your kids cry someplace expensive.
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@TheAlexNevil: *watching an old Lassie show Me: How come you can't do those things? Dog (mutters): If we had a well I'd push you into it.
@OfficialMizGin: I’m not afraid of spiders. I’m afraid of people who are afraid of spiders. Please stop screaming and put down the hammer.
@AnkCoupleTO: Just saw Samuel L. Jackson order a couple of bagels. He paid for them and said thank you so basically now my whole life is ruined