@JasonLastname: Farmers are always so proud of themselves until you ask if they can put the milk back in the cow
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@brakco: I thought I just had a bad headache but according to WebMD I'm a conjoined twin slowly dying from jaundice.
@rockymomax: SNAKE: im gonna bite you SNAKE CHARMER: u are so sexy S: wha- SC: *presses finger to lips* still wana bite me? S: *blushes* well not anymore
@aimlessamers: I hate it when I gain 10 pounds for a role and then realize I'm not even an actor.