@ComedicBust: Fellas, don't waste your time. Memorizing the lyrics to Gangnam Style hasn't gotten me laid once.
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@RexHuppke: My wife said the infinity scarf I got her is too small and I said: "That's mathematically impossible." Anyhoo, we're divorced now.
@notalogin: You burn more calories chasing after your cat than you get from eating it. It's the celery of pets.
@robfee: Lynyrd Skynyrd wrote a song about how great Alabama is, and the only thing they could come up with is that the sky is really blue.