@Ms612: Fellas, if she asks you to sign life insurance policies on the way to your honeymoon, you're probably not making it out alive.
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@Phook75: If a Donkey and Zebra ever mate they'd have to call the offspring a Zonkey because Debra is already taken.
@Book_Krazy: Sam: Welcome to Multiple Personality Club. Sam: No one else is here. Sam: You're here. Sam: I'M YOU, STUPID! Sam: OK EVERYONE CALM DOWN!
@TheMichaelRock: *catches 4yo putting on deodorant* Me: What are you doing? 4yo: Feeding my armpits. Me....as you were.
@myles_morrison: It's easier to get away with stealing someone's stroller if you're dressed as a jogger.