@AGStr8upNinja: Finding a date on the internet is so much easier than real life because how are they supposed to know that's not your Ferrari?
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@str8outaCompUSA: Jesus, don't take the wheel. Give me your keys. Sober up. *hands cup of water* DON'T TURN THAT INTO WINE AGAIN
@MissBamantha: I like to pride myself on knowing whether it's Ice Ice Baby or Under Pressure by the first bum bum bum badda dum bum.
@MariyaAlexander: Someone please recommend a self-help book that can teach me how to sleep through an alarm.
@rolldiggity: 1. Hide babies all over house. 2. If a kid asks, "Where do babies come from?" laugh, "Where DON'T they come from!" and open every cabinet.