@Cpin42: “FINISH HIM,” I scream, as Nana takes the last bite of her gingerbread man.
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@TheDairylandDon: Mah Dearest Emma, War on Christmas is hell. This morn, I saw 7 elves stabbed with 1 menorah. I fear this nog soaked yuletide may nevah end.
@UncleDuke1969: *opens "Job Interview Handbook" *reads "dress for the job you want" *goes to computer *opens browser *Googles "ladies' bicycle seat costume"
@briangaar: Accidentally used the elephant emoji so thanks, Apple, for the next five hours of fighting