@moiragallaga: First, that jerk cut me off in traffic, then he stole my parking space, and then his stupid car got paint on my key!
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@jazmasta: My personal trainer said I should have a protein shake every night at 11pm. That's whey past my bedtime
@Dan_Haak: Me: *being hauled on a stretcher into an ambulance* Shotgun! EMT: dude your gonna die if you si- Driver: dammit Dave, he called shotgun
@Izianikapani: Goldfish: did you remember to take out the garbage? Elephant: [rolls eyes] Goldfish: did you remember to take out the garbage?