@bridger_w: For a moment I thought it was Saturday, but then I realized it's actually Sunday. The good news is now I have a story to tell at parties
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@FierceMess: Sleep deprivation- because sometimes you cant afford drugs or alcohol but still want to feel delusional and irrational.
@McInappropriate: NEW DRINKING GAME: 1) Put on the new Twilight movie 2) When you press play, take 59 shots of vodka so you can die before it starts.
@internetluke: [raises hand in English class] Why do we need to be learned English? "Hmm.. Couldn't have worded that better myself, Luke"
@Jerrypleasure: Mugger: Everyone is sleeping, follow me silently Me: Okay Also me [holding a clicking pen]: *click click click click*