@Marcmywords2: For cardio, I drive before the windshield is defrosted.
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@AristotlesNZ: FB friend's boy in a baseball uniform pic: "Our little pitcher" Me: "He looks more like a catcher" Nobody got it. So I'm back here..
@djdarrellripley: Waitress: Would you like an omelet? Me: Sure. Put it in a martini glass with gin and no eggs...
@juliussharpe: A new study shows dogs recognize pictures of their owners. Also, they're like, "Why are you showing me photos? I'm a dog."