@Black__Elvis: For years I thought that my wife was repulsed by me but as it turns out she just doesn't put out on the first marriage.
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@Momtoteens: When I go see my drug dealer, she makes me lay on a couch and talk to her for an hour first.
@Reverend_Scott: THIS IS THE POLICE. COME OUT WITH YOUR HANDS UP. "Wrong house guys." ARE YOU SURE ABOUT THAT? "Yup, happens a lot." OKAY COOL, SORRY.
@BackrowSeats: This woman at the bar said "move, you're blocking the door" & I'm like strange pickup line but sure here's my number.