@sammontgomery: Forever 21... pounds overweight
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@werehedgehog: In 1752, Benjamin Franklin invented electricity because it was no longer considered humane to execute people using an acoustic chair.
@Brianhopecomedy: I told my wife that size shouldn't matter so she went out shopping and bought my "boys room" a new 4 inch TV.
@Mr_Kapowski: U.S. DEPT OF FORESTRY: Sir, we believe you're hunting illegally GUY IN ALL CAMO W/ ORANGE HAT: *takes off hat* USDOF: Dammit we lost him