@spacexsam: Forever tricking animals into thinking I'm patting them when really I'm just wiping crumbs off of my hands into their fur
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@Go2Slp: How to sports: - Take a ball - Put it someplace someone else doesn't want you to put it - Congratulations you've now sportsed
@oxygenplug: "Yo bro this horse is actin a little weird" "Dude thats my dog get off" "why is ur horse so small" "Its a DOG" Why u pronouncing horse weird
@TheMichaelRock: Batman would probably be a better crime-fighter if he wasn't making movies all the time.
@3sunzzz: Come on royal family, it's not that difficult to name your 3rd child. I have 3 sons, Dustin, Jacob and what's-his-face.