@ryaninco: Forgive me Twitter for I have sinned, it's been twenty minutes since my last Tweet.
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@KeetPotato: magician: "think of a letter, any letter" me: "ok" magician: "now double it" me: [visibly confused]
@truegritrumble: MURDERER: *while murdering me* I feel like you're not taking this seriously. ME: *eating a Belgian waffle* Wut?
@just1fool: Right? That noise. ~Me pretending that I know what I'm talking about when I get my car serviced