@FredPollack: Found a bag of weed in my son's bedroom, absolutely horrified! The thing was practically all stems and seeds.
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@WhatsHerFace33: A spider jumped on my wife which made her stumble backwards and fall over her bag. Oh how I laughed! Tweet posted from the guest bedroom.
@UnicornSyrup: WARNING: If someone sends a link to download the new Nickelback single, DON'T CLICK ON IT! It's a link to download the new Nickelback single