@letsleaveEarth: Friends are like balloons; if you stab them, they die.
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@sfreeze6: My resume is just an old VHS tape of the "Life Goes On" episode where Corky lip syncs "Fight the Power" for his school's talent show.
@QwertyJones3: But my sandwich is so dry! "Sorry sir, that's not what we do here at the Mayo Clinic."
@DevinSiebold: Justin Bieber breaks up with Selena Gomez... the same week Black Ops 2 comes out? Good call Justin.
@iinkedZombie: Me: You have to be nice or Santa won't deliver any toys this year. 5: Me: 5: My brother lets me play with his.